This was my first week back at work, and it was the worst thing ever.
Why I didn't think it would be so bad: I am only back 1/2 time right now, 20 hours a week. Not only that, but I am returning to a job that I actually really love, working with great people! We have an excellent sweedish nanny, and Nory seems to do just fine while she's away from me.
Why it actually is terrible: Not only am I missing out on 2 and a half days with Nory, but when she comes home in the evenings and on my days "off" I am just one mad rush of mommy: laundry-dishes-grocery shopping-laundry-dog to vet-make dinner-feed baby-laundry. I didn't have a chance to give her a bath or read her a book all week. I had been meaning to cut her nails since last Sunday and just got to it today. Not to mention, any exercise routine I had been hoping to achieve has been tossed straight out the window! I'm exhausted beyond exhaustion.
Solution: Well it doesn't look like I am going to get to quit working any time soon (if ever, go go gadget academic career), and I actually really like my job so I don't really mind having to work. What I need is for someone to do my chores for me - any volunteers? While I wait for someone to step up, I think I'll have to dump all the activities that I've been doing just for me - mom's group, running, and sleeping.
Not a good long term plan? Anyone out there have any other ideas? Or does it just magically get easier with time?
She's still so worth it!
6 comments:
Oh Jude! Sounds sad and stressful, but the pic of Nory is really cute! I think you should decide to go with the "this is magically going to improve camp" and then also make a costco/trader joe run and buy a bunch of premade food. Remember when you had a new baby and you couldn't even take a shower? This is like that. You'll get the hang of it, I'm sure and in the meantime, give yourself 2 weeks to eat crummy prepackaged food to save yourself some time and let the house go a little while you read to your little girl :). (Oh, and don't feel too guilty, I never read to Peter at that age - he hated it, but now he likes books all the same!)
I hear that...
Since I graduated (and was pregnant) I kept my part-time only job, and since I was part-time I had NO benefits...and was back to work 1.5 weeks after giving birth. (They were very gracious and didn't expect much out of me, I was just more of a presence at first).
I don't really know your husband, but I'd suggest giving him one of the things to do...? Ric and I tend to do a monster-house-clean every 2 or 3 weeks or so...I still do most of it, but he'll do some things I hate (vacuuming and cleaning the bathtub :) and just live with that for now. I'll also do laundry over night--start a load, go to bed, fold it in the am. Or the next night. Whenever.
I hope you don't have to give up the things that really make you happy (reading, you time)...for the blah things...but I know how stress-inducing piles of dishes and laundry can be. As long as you have something to wear still, you'll be fine :)
OR...Maybe you can work a deal with a grandma? (are they close enough?) to come down every other week or once a month to have quality Nory and Judy time while you get a TON of stuff (cooking/cleaning/stocking/shopping/reading to baby?) done?
We love you! Can't wait to someday have our babies meet and play together and love each other!!
Christine - great idea with the premade food, I think I'll go get some this weekend! I was just thinking how dumb it was for us to have had Dan's mom come out when the baby was born, it seems like it would have been much more useful to have the help now!
Calia - Dan does do a lot of the housework, but he also works a lot so he isn't home much during the week. I think we'll have to get better at doing more of our chores on the weekends! No grandmas available, unfortunately. A good suggestion though :)
Thanks for the encouragement, we'll manage somehow, I'm sure it will just take some getting used to.
fear not, little Judy...it does get easier. i basically don't remember much of the first 6 months after jer was born due to fatigue, stress, hormone readjustment, etc etc...you've undergone a huge change, physically & every other way so it takes time to get back in the groove...
love,
auntie j
What about hiring a highschool or junior high girl to come in and do some chores a few hours a week? Laundry, dishes, bathroom, if she's older a grocery store run with your list? Maybe someone from church who just wants to earn a little extra money? I bet you could get a good worker for not much per hour. Any homeschoolers in your area?
Boy are we ill-equipped to dish out advice on this one. But we've probably had some similar situations of stress & tension in the past, so here goes: relax, put one foot in front of the other, forget about being supermom for a while, and remind yourself that this will all be humorous in a few weeks/months/years, no matter if you ate Costco muffins or vegemite for a while. And be thankful that Nory won't have to work in the family restaurant at age 3 like they do here.
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